Losing weight is hard. We all know that. But it doesn’t have to be. After all, laughter is the best medicine, and it can make the process of shedding pounds a whole lot more fun. That’s why I have put together a list of hilarious, funny weight loss quotes that will help you stay motivated, entertained, and in good spirits. From witty one-liners to inspiring quips, I have got you covered.

Funny quotes about diet and losing weight

  • “I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already.” – Tommy Cooper

Haha, classic Tommy Cooper humor. Maybe not the most effective diet plan, but definitely a good laugh!

  • “The only exercise I get is running late.” – Unknown

Story of my life! Running late is a workout on its own, right? The struggle is real.

  • “I’ve been on a diet for two weeks, and all I’ve lost is two weeks.” – Totie Fields

Oh, the irony! Totie Fields nails the frustration of many dieters.

  • “I’m not overweight. I’m just nine inches too short.” – Shelley Winters

Well, that’s one way to look at it! Shelley Winters adds a touch of humor to body image.

  • “I’m not losing weight. I’m getting rid of it. I have no intention of finding it again.” – Unknown

A positive spin on weight loss! This quote is all about mindset.

  • “I’m on that new diet where you eat everything and pray for a miracle.” – Unknown

Sounds like my kind of diet! A humorous take on the struggle to resist delicious temptations.

  • “I’m allergic to food. Every time I eat, I break out in fat.” – Unknown

Classic self-deprecating humor. A funny way to blame food for those extra pounds.

  • “I’m not fat. I’m just easier to see.” – Unknown

Embracing visibility! A clever way to redefine the perception of body size.

  • “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.” – Unknown

A play on words that never gets old. The seafood diet: see food and indulge!

  • “I’m in shape. Round is a shape.” – Unknown

Round is a shape too, right? A witty response to the societal emphasis on being in shape.

  • “I’m on a 30-day diet. So far, I’ve lost 15 days.” – Unknown

The struggle of dieting is humorously captured! This quote speaks to the challenges of staying committed.

  • “I’m on a whiskey and ice cream diet. I’ve lost a day already.” – Unknown

Whiskey and ice cream – an interesting combo! This quote adds a sweet twist to the concept of a diet.

  • “I’m on the chocolate diet. I’ve already lost three days.” – Unknown

Chocolate lovers unite! A humorous way to admit defeat to the irresistible charm of chocolate.

  • “I’m on a diet, but I’m still looking for that option to email chocolate.” – Unknown

Wouldn’t that be convenient? A funny take on the never-ending love for chocolate.

  •  “I’m on the ‘see food’ diet. I see food, and I eat it.” – Unknown

A classic play on words. The ‘see food’ diet is relatable for anyone with a hearty appetite.

More hilarious sayings about losing weight

funny sayings about diet and losing weight

  • “I’m on a whiskey and cookies diet. I’ve lost a day already.” – Unknown

Whiskey and cookies – a pairing worth losing a day for! This quote adds a delightful touch of indulgence.

  • “I’m not fat; I’m just so damn sexy that it overflows.” – Unknown

Confidence level: Overflowing! This quote humorously embraces body positivity and self-love.

  • “I’m on a diet, but I’ve got fries on the side.” – Unknown

Fries on the side make any diet better, right? A lighthearted way to acknowledge food cravings.

  • “I’m on the whiskey and pizza diet. I’ve lost a day already.” – Unknown

Whiskey, pizza, and lost days – a recipe for a good time! This quote adds a flavorful twist to dieting woes.

  • “I’m on a diet, but I forgot to put it in my mind.” – Unknown

Oops! A relatable quote for those moments when the intention to diet slips from the mind.

  • “I’m on a wine diet. I’ve lost three days already.” – Unknown

Wine enthusiasts will appreciate the humor in this one! A playful take on the time-consuming joy of wine.

  • “I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it, especially if it’s chocolate.” – Unknown

The chocolate twist makes this seafood diet extra tempting! A witty play on the classic phrase.

  • “I’m on a diet, but I’m not hungry. I’m just bored.” – Unknown

Boredom, the sneakiest diet saboteur! This quote humorously acknowledges the challenge of emotional eating.

  • “I’m on the ‘everything in moderation’ diet. I eat everything in moderation, including moderation.” – Unknown

Moderationception! A clever twist on the concept of moderation in dieting.

  • “I’m on a whiskey and chocolate diet. I’ve lost a day already.” – Unknown

Whiskey, chocolate, and lost days – a winning combination for a chuckle! This quote adds a sweet and spirited touch to dieting.

  • “I’m on a diet, but it feels like a snack-attack marathon.” – Unknown

Snack attacks can be intense! This quote humorously captures the challenge of resisting constant temptations.

  • “I’m on a diet, but it’s not working because I still look fat in my dreams.” – Unknown

Dreams have their own reality! This a funny take on the persistence of body image even in the subconscious.

  • “I’m on a wine and cheese diet. I’ve lost three days already.” – Unknown

Wine and cheese, a timeless duo! This quote adds a touch of sophistication to the humorous side of dieting.

  • “I’m on a whiskey and cupcake diet. I’ve lost a day already.” – Unknown

Whiskey and cupcakes – a delightful pair! This quote sweetens the struggle of adhering to a diet plan.

  • “I’m on a diet, but I don’t have a weight problem. I have a chocolate intake problem.” – Unknown

Chocolate lovers, unite! This quote humorously shifts the focus from weight to a chocolate obsession.

The journey to weight loss can be long and challenging, but it doesn’t have to be dull and dreary. These hilarious funny weight loss quotes are a great way to inject some much-needed humor and positivity into your routine. Remember to approach weight loss with a sense of fun and enjoy the process. Who knows, you might just surprise yourself and enjoy it more than you thought. Feel free to share your favorites in the comments section below, and share this post with your friends and have a good laugh together.